“I want to become brave and courageous Not buried in self-pity of my own Ashamed and alone from all That’s been done to me It’s not my fault, I remind myself” -Plumb My parents weren’t exclusively abusive. I don’t think they were the worst parents ever. Before I learned about…Continue Reading
Category: Growing Up Jeub
How a Logical Girl Talked Herself into Fundamentalism, Part 3
This is the third and final part of a series. Click here to read from the beginning, or here to go to part 2. Trigger warning: child abuse “Icy roads beneath my feet, Lead me through wastelands of deceit, Rest your head now, don’t you cry, Don’t ever ask the…Continue Reading
How a Logical Girl Talked Herself into Fundamentalism, Part 2
Trigger warnings: child abuse “I could fight this, but I may die. And all I want is [to] be the apple in your eye Well I could stay here, strap on my face Listen to the words that put me in my place.” –Pendulum I was a curious child. I…Continue Reading
How a Logical Girl Talked Herself into Fundamentalism, Part 1
“Do not look down Or the abysmal beast of non-conformity Might stare some unpleasant truth Into your desensitized mind.” -Meshuggah It was in April 2014 that I read an article on Homeschoolers Anonymous by Sarah Henderson entitled, “Oh daughters of fundamentalism, take upon yourselves the cloak of self-deception.” I read…Continue Reading
‘We Didn’t Kick You Out.’
“Easy for a good girl to go bad And once we gone Best believe we’ve gone forever Don’t be the reason Don’t be the reason You better learn how to treat us right.” -Rihanna Want to know what it’s like to be a Jeub? If you check my dad’s Facebook,…Continue Reading
Why Mom Never Told Us
Trigger warning: physical abuse, self-harm “We are thrown away in the house you made of every stolen moment. Don’t pretend, I know how this ends, and who you are in secret.” -Blue Stahli When I read Libby Anne’s article, “Then why didn’t you tell us that, mom?” it resonated with me.…Continue Reading
The Breakthrough Moment
“How can I pretend that I don’t see What you hide so carelessly? …It’s not what it seems Not what you think No, I must be dreaming… Help, you know I’ve got to tell someone Tell them what I know you’ve done I fear you…” –Evanescence I have blogged very little…Continue Reading
Melting Memory Masks
I wrote this post precisely one year after my parents kicked me out of my house. My dad had just called me at work to say that I couldn’t see my siblings anymore, or visit their house. I had nothing left to lose. Unfortunately, when my blog was lost, I…Continue Reading