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Cynthia "Artemis Stardust" Jeub

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Category: Growing Up Jeub

When Parents Idealize Themselves

  • Posted October 30, 2015June 26, 2018
  • by cynthiajeub
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This is a repost from my restored archives. It was re-uploaded June 16, 2018.  “I don’t think they mean to be abusive, though.” I hear those words at least once a week. People come to me with their stories, and I point out patterns of abuse, and they rush to…Continue Reading

Little Soldiers’ Little Shoulders

  • Posted July 6, 2015June 26, 2018
  • by cynthiajeub
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This article was re-uploaded in 2018. It is part of the archive restoration project.  One of the most important articles I read this year was “When Shame Feels Mothering: The Tragedy of Parentified Daughters.” In it, the author explains how role-switching works with girls who have needy mothers. If a…Continue Reading

Telling the Quiverfull Story – An Interview with Jennifer Mathieu

  • Posted June 2, 2015June 26, 2018
  • by cynthiajeub
  • 2 Comments on Telling the Quiverfull Story – An Interview with Jennifer Mathieu

This is a repost from the archives. My updated thoughts on the subject as of 2018 can be found here.  When I was a teenager living in my parents’ house, I held myself to the highest possible standards, and consistently fell short. I didn’t like the music I was supposed…Continue Reading

Painting One-Dimensional Abusers

  • Posted May 25, 2015July 24, 2018
  • by cynthiajeub
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“I’m sorry, momma! I never meant to hurt you! I never meant to make you cry; But tonight, I’m cleaning out my closet.” -Eminem Last summer, I had a dream about my mother. In the dream, I was in my first consensual, trusting sexual relationship. My mom walked in on…Continue Reading

Children are people…and people are children

  • Posted May 18, 2015July 24, 2018
  • by cynthiajeub
  • Leave a Comment on Children are people…and people are children

This is a re-upload from the lost archives.  “That was childish.” My friend said. “Not very smart, perhaps,” I replied. “But childish? To call something childish – implying inexperience, stupidity, or lack of self-control – is an insult to children. It wasn’t all that uncommon, a mere century ago, to…Continue Reading

To the Imperfect Ones

  • Posted March 18, 2015September 12, 2018
  • by cynthiajeub
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“I thought the reason I wasn’t happy, why I didn’t fit in, was because there was something wrong with me. I wasn’t doing it right, I wasn’t trying hard enough.” I’ve heard it from so many people. They looked like rebels and misfits at the time. This one’s for you,…Continue Reading

Grieving the Mask

  • Posted March 3, 2015September 28, 2018
  • by cynthiajeub
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This post was originally uploaded on March 3, 2015. It is part of the restored archives. I wait for the opportunity to get away, and I step out into the moonlight. The metal gate is covered in frost, and it stings my hands as I climb over it, firmly planting…Continue Reading

Drinking from the Final Straw

  • Posted February 25, 2015June 26, 2018
  • by cynthiajeub
  • 1 Comment on Drinking from the Final Straw

Trigger warnings: alcohol abuse, child abuse, graphic descriptions “We were addicted to the blueprint But we threw it in the flames and now we’re never gonna trace it You, you lied Ha ha ha ha I was right all along Good job, good job You fucked it up… Now you’re walking…Continue Reading

Alecia Pennington, Identity Abuse, and Me

  • Posted February 13, 2015June 26, 2018
  • by cynthiajeub
  • 2 Comments on Alecia Pennington, Identity Abuse, and Me

When I first saw Alecia Pennington’s video about how she can’t prove her American citizenship, nothing about it took me by surprise. I have friends who, like her, don’t exist according to the government. They have no birth certificates, no social security number, no passport. If their parents also distrusted…Continue Reading

Being a Perfect Victim

  • Posted February 3, 2015June 26, 2018
  • by cynthiajeub
  • 1 Comment on Being a Perfect Victim

This is a repost from the archives. For an update, see my post “The Pity Accusation.” Yesterday, my brother Micah posted on my Facebook timeline. He didn’t address me directly – he was telling people not to believe the stories I was “making up” about my family. It took me…Continue Reading

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